Let me tell you something I’ve come to know for sure: everybody is going to take a different path in this life we’ve been given. I don’t think I’m blowing anybody’s mind with this revelation. But it’s easy to know a thing and not be able to live it. I know the Lord put me in this world for something that nobody else can do like I can. I also believe it for everybody else. That’s why you can’t do me like me, and I would never even try to do you! I want to be a writer, but I’m no Gloria Naylor, no Toni Morrison, no Terry McMillan. I’m just Mariah . . . and it’s enough. These talented ladies could never do me like I do it.
When It Hit Me:
I was watching a YouTube video of this new Rita Ora chick. She’s cool. I don’t hate her. But Ms. Ora definitely took notes from Beyonce and probably has Rihanna posters hanging in her bedroom. Now, I’m not saying that Ms. O is ripping off Queen Bey and Rih Rihs’ styles, but . . . well, you know. I mean, Beyonce and Rihanna inspire me some days. Who hasn’t done a few extra squats at the gym trying to get Beyonce thighs? Who hasn’t considered going blonde, red, or jet black because Rihanna makes it look so cool? Absolutely nothing wrong with that. I’m just saying I can’t be Beyonce! That chick does about 34 things that I could never do, and I’ve been practicing since 8th grade. It’s not gonna happen! But guess what? Poor Beyonce could never do me. And we all know Rihanna would need to get her weight up (literally) to be a fraction of me 😉
It Hit Me Again:
I was at one of my best friend’s house with a bunch of other friends getting ready to go out. We were primpin’ and preppin’ in the bathroom, and one of the girls took her shirt and bra off. Let’s not even get into how comfortable this chick was. I mean, I know I wasn’t all that cool with her, and she hit me with them boobies like we were blood cousins. You know, and she left her top off for an extended period of time. Do you know why? Because those breasts were beautiful! They just did all the things a woman hopes her breasts might do. Do ya’ll know this bothered me?
I started wondering why I couldn’t have a chest like that. I actually think mine shrunk as I’ve lost a little weight. (I might seriously cry if I go down a cup size because there’s not much further down to go.) But I can’t be that chick! Only she can look and be like her. I can only do me . . . and it’s enough.
So when some of my friends land big jobs, get married to great guys, or have bodies like greek gods (Really, this chick was built like Athena or somebody) I am genuinely happy for them. (After I give myself a pep talk.) More importantly, I don’t question why it’s not happening for me. I don’t doubt God’s plan for my life. I don’t second-guess my capabilities or my attractiveness or any of the other things I’m so good at being insecure about. I’m doing me. I’m good.
Also, when someone else is on some other stuff, I try to let them figure out their own journey. If you want to quit law school and go to seminary school (huh?), I let you because you’re doing what’s best for you. If you want to leave your ugly dude for a dumb dude (huh?), I let you because you have to live with him, not me. If you flunk out of school, get divorced, have 13 kids out of wedlock, color your hair red like Rihanna, or just make decisions I probably wouldn’t make, I let you because you’re just doing you (or trying to do a Rihanna). I don’t know anything about your journey. I can’t do you like you’re doing you. I can’t judge (still working on this).
I do me because I’m the best person in the world to do it. So yeah, get like me and do you 😉